“It’s an idiosyncratic thing, VR when it began there were visions for it..” he says to me. It’s a dead medium now, insisting with rigor, he knows. He knows its dead. Why? Because he killed it? He saw something I haven’t seen.. the death of.. what? Is something dead when there’s no money? How can it be dead when so many people I know are alive and doing? Making? Gatherings, projects, events, ideas.. all with VR/XR.

We all want the big. PROJECTION and spheres to enter inside something epic. But darn it, I just love the intimate, the way the headset takes me somewhere. i don’t love games, I never want to be in a VR corn maze trying to find a hatchet, oh please never - I’d rather sit on the floor and close my eyes. But a short animation? Poignant, there for the big feels, the wonder, the.. Oh an animated short in VR is where the medium makes sense.. Or a performance like Noire - that one is so stunning it’s unbelievable.

VR.

I joined in after the visions, but in a years time I was swimming deep in the world.

Thinking on this, when did I first feel that sense of exhilaration? The “WOW now THIS is what VR could do..!” I think it was the work Gondwana, by Emma Roberts and Ben Andrews. So thoughtful, intentional, making visible something that I never would have thought of, making me reflect, but also giving me the chance to wander in a dreamlike space where time was different. I got dizzy after a while - a reminder that VR is best in short moments, brief. Go in for the unreal or other wordly and come out for the real, the here and now. I love that.. I do. That feeling.. But only when the time is carved out. Intentionally.

Now I fight some forms of cynicism, within myself and outside of myself. A piece like Gondwana haunts me.. I never knew it would.. back when I enthusiastically rattled on to Emma and Ben all the places I could imagine the work living.. But where I imagine work going and what actually happens sometimes has a big gap. One I am STILL contending with.

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In 2023 I started to feel the weight of not being able to deliver on those imaginations. My health was declining, I never expected that I’d be in such a visible role (even if it was small and silly and I was still very green… I still am in a lot of ways too. wisened and green, like a tree). And I’ll plug this into the Claude editor* and it will tell me - this is too wandering, meandering. This isn’t a poem, this isn’t anything. Well shoot, let me just advocate for the Unserious Artist ok? The one that pours it out rather than perfects. That doesn’t work in XR, where the medium is the message — and what’s that? Perfectionism, fascism, control, polish.. anything else?

Curiosity, care, perspective, empathy, innovation, playfulness, exploration.. those things too.

/

Dead Medium he says.

It had some support, but when there wasn’t the public support … Well maybe we must support the public?

How can VR be a priority when.. well, the burning planet, the suffering. At lunch she says to me that she really sees the evil side of humanity. A labor lawyer, defending the people against big industry. “They lie, they insult, they are relentlessly mean.”

And how can that change?

We agree it has to come from within… Can VR be a tool that helps wiggle in those spaces and create a small pocket of reflection?

I saw in a reel this morning a group of employees that were locked in a factory, beaten, humiliated, forced to work..

He says to me, “La future existe, mais ne pas distribuée uniforme.”

Aren’t we part of that decision making? What are we doing?

/

Collaborate, collaborate, collaborate. VR.. stories.. A medium that is BETTER with humans. Better (I’d argue) when the real is part of it. This project, immersive story club, was an idea that comes from the gap. From an imagined reality where a hybrid book/movie club resonated and people showed up and places adopted the format and the bottlenecks of XR storytelling dissolved over time.

And the amazing people along the way that have helped me flesh this idea out and gave me worlds of wisdom.. well that’s been great. And something must evolve. Something must pivot. The best way isn’t to write a nonlinear substack post about it, but also.. In this era, if we are not being ourselves, human, fully here, I don’t know what we are doing.

But / and also, maybe this is my limitation as a person. I’m more people than polish. I’m not technical, I’m feel so brutally human. I keep connecting with people — brilliant folks from around the world. The network here seems so so capable of working together, of helping, of IMPACT. and I don’t really know my role right now.

I know that VR short form stories move me. I love talking with people about them. I love connecting with people. And I dream of a French / US bridge in XR, because I cannot help but appreciate the French way of being.. and I can’t help but wish that this US world was more gracious to the other.. no place is perfect. We are all flawed beings.

And that’s ok.

But it’s important to

connect and collaborate. So this. If you’ve gotten this far, this is me putting that energy out there. Saying “hey, I don’t know where I’m going yet, but I do think there are ways to weave worlds. Maybe I need to accept that I am not a producer - I am a writer. Or that my art is for me. But these Vr films you all make, that you COULD make.. I want places for them to land that resonate. Even if it’s small. I dream of helping in this way. Because I think I can.

Time will tell.

/

*I did not plug it into AI. This is raw, lightly edited for spelling, living up to the title “a stream of consciousness prose about VR and feelings”

I come to this project “Reimagining ways to share VR stories” from the XR world (in France). A very specific ecosystem, structure, and way of seeing the art form and medium of VR filmmaking. I was deeply embedded in the XR festival circuit, the video calls, the logistics and licensing conversations with curators, manufacturers, producers. In that context, my job was to be a technical and social shepherd, an industry bridge. There was a lot of throwing spaghetti at the wall, some of which would stick.

But the missing logic was too heavy to hold — the licensing only seemed to make sense for festivals, a lot of the indie work, short form stories in the catalog, wasn’t designed for LBE. And the work being designed for LBE wasn’t something I could seem to really get my hands on. For good reason too! I shifted. Wiggled away, out of that world, I followed curiosity, a need to reclaim my own inner voice, and proximity with my roots. But that brought it’s own series of strange.. The XR world I had been in was full of visionary questions, dreaming, working hard toward something outside of the self. I saw myself there. I was unable to feel at ease in a slowness that said “well that’s just how it is, how it’s going to be.” These were phrases I heard left and right. Meanwhile, inequity and gaps in civic infrastructure in the part of the world I’m from screamed at me. Maybe it was because I came from France to New England…

And so, I wiggled back into XR, and I found I hadn’t actually ever left. I just went down a path that gave me a more clear sense of self, and a cornucopia of questions. And by chance, those questions aligned with folks at Agog - those asking “what’s XR for impact?” look like? Because we know it’s impactful.. those of us that teared up in Book of Distance or felt emotionally moved in The Man Who Couldn’t Leave.

But there is a gap. The HOW a work lands, where it goes, how it is shared. You can say distribution. At the end of the day, SHARING is the word I come back to again and again. Because it’s about getting work out there. And it’s complicated, layered, and reveals so much more than I can say or see right now as I write this. But I’ll try.

paradigm shift

6 years into this field, 32 years on this planet, 7 months into this immersive story club project, I find myself managing a fleet of VR headsets, organizing VR storytelling gatherings. There’s a paradigm shift. Instead of the ‘Decision-Maker’, I’ve embodied a role of the human around the tech. I’m still articulating why ‘docent’ and ‘onboarding/off boarding’ doesn’t sit right in this work. Immersive Story Club is revealing that there is an art to sharing a VR film. And that this can be a creative way in itself. What’s important to me is sharing creative agency, even if you are “not technical.” There’s joy in making space, there’s something precious about being hospitable without bending over to some contemporary expectation of servitude.

The shift also comes from the fact that as a club, we are in this together. The format is up for discussion, informed by the group. Experience happens in a headsets briefly, but majority is out of the headset, in the room, in the conversation. Diffusing creative agency, making THAT accessible is a motivating factor for me, and I really do think that this could be a key part of making the medium accessible too. Because that SERVES versus demands. It’s an opportunity! A TOOL!

None of this is business-model logic. BUT can we REALLY say that business model logic makes any sense these days?? Release the romantic past, of selling a film and streaming it all around. VR is it’s own thing. And let’s give the bottom-up approach a chance to be!! To be real, to impact people by giving them a chance to see and engage. What’s better than a conversation over a shared memory? What if you can make the VR film the launching point for that?

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visionary idealism.. “brain worms”

As you can read, I’m working with roughly 20% of “AI brain worms” (phrase from Delta_Arc). I’ll own that, it’s easy to mentally leap 20 leagues in the future and not do the laundry, water the plant, take a moment away from a screen and “touch grass.” I’ll try to keep it in check. But.. VR.. with such a forward facing medium, why would we expect it to confirm to archaic models that are suffocating us?

Meaningful VR distribution might be as simple as funding practitioners and third spaces equitably. Fund someone/s and show them the creative agency to play with a VR film. Would this open things up for a gentle growth of new folks coming together for new reasons — a VR film club? It’s utopic. Beautiful. And it’s grant funded. Who’s funding? Well, those that believe in the medium, that see the powerful ways a story can be shared… Nothing is stable!

But what’s of value? With this medium’s capacity, there’s a chance to have voices from South Africa reach those in rural New England, in an extraordinarily otherworldly tour with thoughtful and historical avatars — discussion, connection, wonder… empathy? It’s immeasurable. How about public transportation and equitable diffusion of resources — which are FUNDING PEOPLE TO DO THE WORK OF BEING WITH OTHER PEOPLE IN DIGNITY. Librarian. Poetry group in an indie space. Help that indie space pay for a sprinkler system so that more art and gathering can happen. Without so much of the prestige, but for the people in the room, that need this to feel connected and loved and spread that out into the world. There’s a chance for the world of tech arts to build a bridge to civic infrastructure. But why do we in this space keep looking up higher and higher at these apexes of arts and culture?.. I guess we must, but it doesn’t seem to help if you ask me. Other paths must exist too.

The dreams abound - what’s the reality? Create value and you find value. I believe in this. What does it look like?

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“What stayed with you?”

Recently, I’ve been asking the question “What stayed with you?”

“The care with which you led the gathering gave me permission to approach the things that matter with the same amount of consideration and care.
Why not show up full-hearted, full-throated to what matters to you?”

I’ve been sitting with that.

We are all trying our best. The tools we have to work with are different. And sometimes it’s intimidating to take something seriously, to insist on depth in an era that rewards speed, to gather people in a room and ask them to slow down. What’s sticking with me, what is staying with me, is this: VR is better with humans behind it.

It’s small. But it’s also huge. Because if emerging tech art can help weave that LOGIC into place, alongside existing care-based, community-rooted infrastructure, then maybe that’s an example of doing things differently. Not waiting for permission. Not optimizing for scale before meaning.

That’s what’s staying with me. Virtual Reality can be as utopic as it is dystopic. And in this way, for those of us in the field that are working with hope as ACTION - it’s a mirror. A microcosm. Another tool to get the job done.

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The Immersive Story Club is ongoing. If you’re curious, let’s find out what stays with you.

A little glimmer of a moment in sharing this “dystopian” tech and collection of riveting storytelling experiences:

This woman sat down to read in the bookstore in the afternoon during one of our hybrid Art Making and VR story meet up this winter. She had zero interest in VR and even less interest in talking with me or anyone else. But she was in the middle of it all. People ebbed and flowed around her as I asked them questions, helped them get into VR and then met them after to see what their thoughts were — and make space for them to be listened to. We were sharing the 2017 experience Blind Vaysha, by Theodore Ushev (NFB, Canada), a story that translates a folk tale into an immersive HMD experience where you are asked to close one eyes and then the other, embodying a girl who can only see the future with her right eye and the past with her left. It begets questions about where one might find themselves, where mindfulness falls in their lives. But also, the medium in itself, with all the strangeness and novelty in this off the beaten path, indie, punk arts/used bookstore brings up general dialogue about technology in our lives.

VR as a medium seems to bring up AI for people outside of VR

A face computer, coming from a different tech hype cycle that never caught on, is a welcome invitation to reflect on AI. We hold the complexity of the vast potential for good with the immense resources and exploitation involved in the current processes, all imbued with the era of today - funding cuts, equity divide, lack of cohesion,… This film in particular is a great example of the way an arts story can be a conduit for depth of reflection. This piece doesn’t tell us what to think. Rather, it plays with perception, and then the allegory of the film opens up the conversation to wondering where our own personal perspectives are rooted. Do we live with a view more in the future or the past? How do we cultivate mindfulness in the present?

These conversations unfolded around the woman with the suitcase. But each time she was asked if she wanted to try, she denied. Instead for hours she sat there, reading. After a while I stopped offering her the headset and made sure to give her space. Until eventually, as hours went by, I sort of forget she was there. We reached the end of the day, 6:30pm.

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Ember Wheeler and I sat in the back of the store, talking about what happened.. One of the many things Ember does is she runs the local weekly poetry group. When I met her and saw how she ran this program, I was so inspired. In my head I’ve called her a “local leader” - just because the way she weaves her mental health experience and own artistic practice into this group, seamlessly, zero extraction, genuine care... She’s someone I’ve known for years as a space maker - gentle and safe. And she was someone I knew could trust to hold with me the messy middle of figuring out all of these ideas of the counter example- the club. The Immersive Story Club. So at this time, we were in the heat of the CT pilot, workshopping at multiple venues sometimes several times a week and debriefing regularly. That day in the back of the store, we were both amazed at all the little moments that clicked. It was the first time it really felt fluid in a while. We were still wondering, pondering about this clunky and bizarre technology. We talked together while the woman who sat there with her mysterious suitcase and disinterested demeanour faded further into the background.

.

Until all of a sudden, she pipped up,

- answering a question asked hours prior, like I had just finished asking.

I couldn’t believe it.

Jumping up, I was ready, thrilled to help her as she went into the virtual.

7 minutes later, she came out, I met her eyes and we locked in.

I saw clearly in that moment that a certain barrier had been removed when she took of that headset.

We sat together. I learned that life had brought her on an unknown way. Her journey wasn’t over, she was seeking, moving, finding. She shared words of wisdom about life, aging, her unexpected trials and tribulations. She spoke about how family and closeness changed for her over time. We made eye contact and I could feel the significance of being someone here for this moment.

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This to me was a glimmer moment, A moment where I could see how the story could be a spring board and this specific medium - with it’s unique intensity, could allow for a veil to be pulled away, from even the most stubborn sources.

This specific gathering (and many ISC iterations) have been about togetherness, showing up and trying. A story MADE BY ARTISTS WITH HEART AND SOUL AND DELIBERATE INTENTION landing in a setting, can hold people and care in ways that are potentially small but mighty in significance. In doing this work, I’ve realized that what we are doing here is in response to automation. It is calling for opportunities to uplift humanity.

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We search for meaning. To do good things for others. This is part of being a healthy human. This tool will…. _________________ —> What? That’s not up for me to decide.

NOT save us, in fact, there’s a chance that maybe VR (especially on its own, following a market) is more harmful than good. But moments like this.. felt connective and like this medium opened us up to each other, when in a place, setting and circumstances that have been baked carefully.

As this goes on, I want and need to dedicate more on the story, the artists behind the art - but right now, I’m focusing on the people. The role of the people sharing VR and the ways it hits people and really what benefits can be brought to people who are exposed to the stories and medium. I cannot say “this is the best thing for right now, let’s run ahead!” Nope. I can say there are glimmers. Where art and gathering and being there for a safe place to stay for a bit is allowed. This is rare in most places, but I see there is a crucial need for folks to have access to non hierarchical open and creative spaces.

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The other day I attended a Claude Design event by Dapta - a last minute invite to Frontier Tower, “a vertical village for people advancing deep tech and frontier technologies.”

I was invited by another member of the Gray Area cohort I am part of for the next four months. The Gray Area incubator is the reason I came to Silicon Valley - to incubate the immersive story club project, a container that I thought would really help this work and efforts to connect with the questions that we are trying to answer:

• Can XR live in low-barrier, recurring, community formats?

• What does facilitation + ritual look like outside institutions?

• What makes people come back weekly?

• How do you build bottom-up participants’ behavior?

My work in this field, specially as someone donned the “hat of VR Distribution expert” has brought me here. And my opinion (shared among others that consider themselves part of the industry), is that XR Distribution has implications way beyond licensing, marketing, contracts, formats, localisation, and agreement terms.

All of that context to share that being at that event, while working in a parallel yet totally different sphere, was most definitely eye opening. Firstly, I want to say that in San Francisco, the AI influence is more palpable, pulsing, and absurd than reading about it from a distance can ever fully communicate. And so I write this, knowing that those who will read it most likely fall in the sphere of XR/VR/ Immersive storytelling. “The intersection of art and technology.” For the record - I am of the belief that this intersection might be one of the few ways to create space for reason to be able to enter decision-making rooms in time to remind us of our humanity at a crucial juncture of human evolution. This is where the idealism of VR for me starts to take shape. I imagine small working groups with AI business folks, where somehow through exposure to another perspective, the conversation catalyzes and there are a series of Ah-hah! moments that open up the ways for a world where DEI is welcomed and supported again. Dreams!

….

Let’s take a step back and just give very specific context about the day I went to the Claude Design event demonstrating VIBE SELLING. May 1st. May day - a day that internationally calls for us to ring the bells, sound the alarms, wave the flags and highlight the vitality of worker’s rights. Mutual support, immigrants rights, the start of the 8 hour work day was brutally fought for just 140 years ago (equivalent to the lifespan of just two 70 year olds). As we walked to Frontier Tower, the streets were blocked off for a solidarity parade. We joined, recognising the irony of lending out voices to the chants of “When Workers’ rights are under attack, what do we do? Stand up, fight back!” while walking to join an AI event in a tower a few blocks down the way.

To register for the event was easy - just shared your LinkedIn - prove you are IN and then they will buzz you up. This tower has a real distinct feel to it that I couldn’t fully place until watching that video. You just know you are entering into a reality that is a part from the streets along the way — streets which are hostile non-homes for many. Every floor is labeled with some sort of tech inside joke - cryptic, playful.. it’s clear that this place has had an influx of money flowing through it.

We arrive at a presentation where you have to have Claude pro to really join in (low rate only 20$ a month…) — but that’s ok because even if you can’t access the technology, there is a real time demonstration showing how to set up your own agentic AI. Agentic, meaning an autonomous agent capable of pursuing complex, multi-step goals, reasoning, and taking actions independently without constant human oversight. A few steps into the vibe coding process - the demonstrator arrives at a solution. The agent, equipped with business-oriented directives, calls him on his cellphone, ready - beck and call. An easy ageist joke is made - “So Agent, I’m a boomer…” a preface that is cause for collective chuckle, a not so innocent dig at the vast swaths of those excluded from the room. Being the butt of a joke… soft on the surface with violent implications only visible when we peel back the layers.

Digital equity is complex - there are actual experts working on this. But since joining the National Digital Inclusion Alliance I am seeing the reports of those without broadband - unable to access healthcare because of the systems that require online forms, cut off from working in wide ranges of fields because the computer and technology knowledge is an essential component. And on top of that, it’s hard to not think of the people I passed that day in the streets of the city, bent in half, open sores, swollen feet, sometimes unable to walk. The other day on the bus a man sweating profusely, sat next to me, until someone else told me to move seats. He was possessed from hallucinating poisons, convulsing.. It’s somehow normal here.. Portland.. I’ve seen this in Montreal as well. I guess it’s everywhere. New England is too cold and Paris hasn’t seen the horrors of fentanyl. But the contrast of suffering with the visionary, polished, technology tower is so stark.

It’s of course something I’ve grappled with for years working in XR — how can we pour so much into a technology when there are real people suffering immensely? George Floyd - wake up, wake up! I was in Paris, in VR, disconnected and yet.. When I would meet artists in this field of storytelling, working with these powerful tools FOR GOOD, for IMPACT— I felt motivated. Locked in. Let’s go. Do you also carry this dichotomy with you? A scale that tips between “I am part of the problem” and “I can be part of solutions.”

As the presentation advances, the CEO of a start up for high performing people called Actioners comes on stage. Looking into Daniel Salinas’ work, I can see that Daniel probably cares deeply about the planet and where he is from. Five years ago he was already developing a machine learning tree seed germination (AI and drone). Great - Daniel is an example of a high performer— he is clearly very fit, sharp witted, business-minded, charismatic, globally relevant. At 19 he received the MIT Innovators Under 35 recognition for the development of a biotech technology. At 20 he developed and sold a ticketing startup and presented at the World Economic Forum. His video application for seed germinating ends with a call to “disrupt the industry of tree planting with a global army of drones.” The words disrupt and army stand out to me.

At some point Daniel says that agents will free up our time to focus on what really matters. “Serving the client” and “bringing something the world hasn’t seen yet.” I couldn’t help but wonder — what about what the world needs? As we sit in this tower and someone outside aches with addiction and someone in Iran digs through rubble, and someone in Sudan makes it through another day of hunger.. I think back to the Games for Change conference workshop I attended last June by Marc Buckley - an ecological economic, regenerative futurist and solar punk. He asks us to ask “what does a world that works for everyone look like for you?”

Everyone. Every one. Climate justice is not independent from racial justice, which is connected to affordable housing, connected to meaningful-purpose driven work - pathways for humane involvement with the world around us — public transportation, infrastructure to help parents - especially young parents, breaking cycles of abuse, which helps with cycles of addiction: programs. Social work, community work, clean living.. things that don’t make sense for business as we know it. The ROI needs redefining.

So I ask Daniel, where do these questions fall when we consider what the world needs most?

He says to me, since he was a child, he dreamt about a forest on Mars.

I don’t think my face could hide my feelings. Is it because I’ve been exposed to some of the most powerful VR documentaries ever made- where I’ve had the chance to mentally and digitally be in a perspective that is different from mine, but grounded in the reality of someone else? Does that inform this feeling that this is an answer disconnected from what we really need?

Jasmine Sun, guest writer for the NYTime wrote an opinion piece last week titled, “Silicon Valley is Bracing for a Permanent Underclass.” Being here, I feel it’s already a reality. Talk with anyone working in the service industry — there is something off in the culture. The towers take us higher and higher into a stratosphere only a few can board the ship to reach. Meanwhile, the ground is home to many. The sidewalks, when clean and clear, glitter in the streetlights, help us walk from place to place, hold the trees and plants that bloom and brighten our lives. The simple, beautiful reality that exists as it is — this needs help. There’s SO much room for care-based initiatives. But only if and when we turn our attention this way. Balance.

With my project, Immersive Story Club, I know it’s small potatoes. The format of sharing a VR film- simple. Is it though? Not when you think about the world we are living in. Jasmine interviewed engineers, VCs, CEOS and more and writes that many are convinced that advanced A.I. will soon surpass human capabilities.

My thoughts are - sure. When it comes to admin (taxes, Telehealth forms, managing a calendar, etc.) that would be great. If the government was equipped with more efficient technology solutions that ease bureaucratic processes.. COOL! I am not an expert in this, but I do think there are many good people doing good work and I cheer this on. But that’s not where I find my motivation. We have work to do when it comes to humane, purpose-driven work. THIS - work that helps and is valued. The knowledge economy has made it so that those doing physical labor, or real life-public facing work.. Well, it’s often very undervalued. Taken for granted.

This is one idealistic pillar about Immersive Story Club - sharing VR really does really enhance the experience when there is someone facilitating. This is a real role, a valid role. Programs. An activity that isn’t just for merriment or to make a profit, but because the story is powerful and can help a small group grapple with something complex and take it blackout into their world (and because of that value - it is worth the expense — see the difference?). That’s what I hold dear as I try my best to bring it to life and share that perspective. The possibility of a counter example - how grand.

We want autonomous tech, scaled, big bucks, solutions. But what about the small? The people that need to sit with others, try something, learn something. I dream of empathy workshops, cathartic connections, eye opening realisations that translate into action..

It’s a massive tangled web isn’t it? Pull one thread and I can see that it just keeps going.

Leaving the tower, an elderly woman walks up to us with a walker and asks if we have any dollars. Both of us keep digital currency - tap and Apple Pay, the only thing we can offer at that moment was a granola bar (shrinkflated by nearly 30%). “At least it’s something” she says. I wonder how harsh her life is and then quickly let the moment slide past me. It feels too big, she is part of the nearly 8,300 people living without a residence in this

But all of these little encounters add up.

And it’s a very complex issue. Every person has a story of why and how their life brought them into such harsh living conditions. Speaking with someone who works for years in the child and community services sector of the Bay Area, she said the cycles of neglect and abuse are what needs to be broken - that this is the way to make change, to focus on root causes. But also she said that equitable resources for programs that could effectively connect young people with caring adults - an example of pathways towards a stable, constructive way of living, are hard. For me - yes, focus on the children - but if those parents don’t have support, well.. It’s complex!

What I noticed in New England is that the ways town and district lines are cut impact the types of resources that flow towards the community. So a wealthier area will have a library with advanced services and programs while 10 minutes away will be in a much more dire situation. This replicates much of the US. Poet Tim Stafford has a collection of poems about living in poverty and the phrase “Broke stay Broke” sticks with me — it’s hard to not draw that conclusion in my work as well. I’m seeing how it is much harder to make things happen with XR in places that are outside of institutional support, whereas a place with resources already is much more equipped to take on the complexity of advanced technology arts.

And so, the digital divide continues.

But this isn’t to say that there aren’t many many good things possible (and happening) with this frontier technology.

This weekend I volunteered to pick up trash in the Tenderloin. With our yellow jackets and trash bags, walking around “encampments” which are just places on the sidewalks where someone(s) that are struggling with some of the worst pitfalls for a human to fall into, sit with their belongings. Walking around different folks in these circumstances, they thanked us for cleaning their streets. That felt good. Small, but good. Good because it was real. This program is SFLuv, it’s a crypto model.. But oriented toward civic engagement and showing up for community on a local scale. A microcosm of tech for good – intentionally and caringly created. Building something good takes time and effort.

The microcosm, the counter example. We might be living in a time where it feels like blinded and hasty capital-driven decisions take the reigns. But this is why we write, talk, and show up. This is why I am not in France, why I’m in the belly of the beast - San Francisco - to find the ways. And because Agog generously supports impact in this field. Trust-based for now. As we work hard to find meaningful examples that help us face our largest challenges. Which are not answered with solutions that make money first, but respond to the poly-crisis with compassion. Easier said than done! But this work extends outside of our lifetimes. We do what we can, link arms with others, and hopefully some of those “high performing people” get on board and channel those energies to initiatives like picking up trash and feeding those in need.

There’s always room to give, don’t you think?

Thanks for reading!!

IDFA 2024? Brilliant. The R&D Summit that year redefined awe and shared a grounded, realistic overview of XR storytelling. The depth of the curation revealed itself more and more as the week went on. I reconnected with XR folks after being completely off the radar for a year, and it was enriching. I laughed and danced in a social VR experience so immersive I forgot I was even wearing a headset. For the first time in a while, I felt that spark—the familiar question that lights up everything: Why VR?

And yet, despite the brilliance of the fest, I totally flooped it.

A year and a half later, I’m finally over my own hesitation to share, so here we go!

Sarah Wolozin of MIT Open Doc Lab presenting the key challenges of distribution - highlighting my lived reality as a VR distributor. A relieving and strange moment to witness.

The Floopy Bit

After being in a visible role as an XR Distributor, you can’t (even though I did) show up to IDFA with fluffy answers to “So what have you been up to?”

“Umm, did you know there’s a vast network of craft schools?”

What? Weren’t you the bright-eyed ‘distribution expert’ with all the answers? And then you just disappeared into the woods to… blow glass and take out the trash? (much more than this - Danielle of 2026 can attest, but at this time, it was still foggy…back to the story—>)

Ok cool. So why are you here? What are you doing now?

Great questions! The honest answer at that time was: I’m still figuring that out.

Not the most polished response, but it was true. I left Astrea at the end of 2023 for a plethora of reasons. My explanation shifts each time I give it because a one line answer doesn’t capture all of the nuances needed to respond.

• The diplomatic reason: Everyone needs change.

• The cosmic reason: It just wasn’t meant to be.

• The moral reason: I felt the work wasn’t aligned with my values.

There were no villains or scandals. I just needed space, a pause to answer the questions that had been gnawing at me: What are we doing? Why? Who am I helping? Who is benefiting? And who really wants VR to be mainstream, and for what reasons?

And then deeper questions… what does it mean to be an artist and what role does the artist play in society, especially in a time of unignorable violence and inequality?

A Search for Balance

The weight of those questions, coupled with personal challenges, hit hard in 2023. I lost my cat, my stability, and my ability to care for myself and others in ways that felt meaningful. When the opportunity to step away presented itself, I took it,no plan, just instinct.

I rejected decision-making roles, tired of endless pitching and posturing. Instead, I sought spaces to do good, to research, to make with my hands. I spent significant time with my 87-year-old grandfather, had deep conversations, and unearthed familial patterns I hadn’t seen before. I made sculptures, not for a project or deadline, but to externalize the ideas, fears, and loves that were trapped inside me.

I lived for 4 months at Snow Farm, The New England Craft Program, surrounded by living, working artists who chose independence over comfort. It was raw, strange, and confusing, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity I defended fiercely.

For years, my box was “Distributor.” Don’t get me wrong, boxes can be useful, but many of us don’t belong in just one. That season of my life, I explored other boxes, expanding my understanding of who I can be.

Because for me personally, at Astrea and with Atlas V, I found it difficult to strike a balance with the work I was doing and who I wanted to be. Working at the intersection of art and technology might encourage extremes –

But extremes aren’t really sustainable, are they? It can be in some ways.. take festivals for example—>

Rediscovering XR

IDFA in 2024 felt like a return. There was a time when I was in the extremes of festivals - left and right pulled to gatherings around the world. Hindsights - that pattern might have been part of the imbalance that contributed to me needing to step away from the field. I was festival-saturated by the end of 2023.

It was my third time attending the Doc Lab gathering, but this time without a plan. I remember it being nerve-wracking. But then, coming back reminded me why I fell in love with XR in the first place: the medium’s ability to expand our imaginative capacity. And the festival, thoughtfully curated, critically engaged - become that fertile site that I can look back on as a key moment for perspective and connection.

And the selection that year.. well… it reminded me about the wonder of VR, the innate capacities..

I’ve been in hundreds of virtual spaces and stories at this point in my life. I’ve played ‘mirror’ with a rabbit girl in a tracksuit in an endless horizon blue world (VR Chat memory). I’ve stood in the photogrammetry captured homes of indigenous Bedouin women, listening to their stories about their fight for land rights (Remember This Place: 31°20’46’’N 34°46’46’’E). I’ve learned about the history of the partition between India and Pakistan through family stories (Child of Empire). I’ve danced and hit virtual percussion with a live performer with a typewriter head (Typeman)

What does this do to the mind? To the “imaginative muscle”? Does it strengthen it? Is it pushing me towards envisioning other realities and new possibilities?

That past year, I discovered that I could step into many roles: museum administrator, curator, craft school programmer, professor, even artist (making and showing work, organizing gatherings). And after all that exploration, with the help of IDFA 2024, I began to find my ways back towards re-engaging with XR – this time prioritizing meaningful action (impact?).

Festivals are essential and generous and we thank all that work so hard to make them real. And of course, we see that in the conversations around XR distribution, it can be somehow easy to blame the festivals for the fact that XR doesn’t leave the festivals so very often.. But let’s just try to take a step back, right? I don’t have answers, but I for sure know that festivals have helped me in my journey and many other artists and curious, passionate souls – and they will continue to do so!

And so, with that said, festivals or not festivals doesn’t negate that the medium of VR poses many challenges. It'‘s often a topic discussed at the fest. To the point that some even ask “well why VR?” like we should just drop all effort and let it go. Some say, it was a fad, voila, it’s done, now you frontier tech fad follower, just go join the hoards of AI enthusiasts and see what you can do with your life!

Nah.. VR, I’m still in the VR space. So,...

Why VR?

The risks of VR are undeniable (anyone else think of Octavia Butler’s Parable of the Talents and Dreammasks?), but perhaps that’s why it’s worth pursuing? The dystopian examples caution us, while solarpunk visions offer nascent glimpses of what could be… right?

The market often asks, How does this make money? But shouldn’t we also ask, How does this serve us? Could VR, with its unique ability to convey complexity, help us dream of better futures? Could it play a role in fostering the problem-solving skills we need to tackle the challenges shaking us to our core?

I believe it could.

But not without intentional aligned efforts, supportive infrastructure, and culture building that finds ways to connect what happens in a headset to the real needs of the moment… Oh so much easier to write about this than to know what that actually translates to in real time, in real action!

The hopeful in me finds peace in the perspective that humanity is a young species. Violence ebbs and flows, there is no utopian end game, just the endless back and forths of adding good to the world and sucking it up for the self, out of fear or greed, ignorance or delusion.

I won’t deny my reservations – I can’t help seeing the XR industry is the apex of the best and worst. Is it fair to say that VR is dealing with the extremes of power, influence, greed and innovative hopeful spirit, idealism, activism, genuine attempts to do good and/or elevate the self..? There’s so much waste, but also brilliance, especially in the world of immersive documentaries. Especially at IDFA.

And so leaving the fest that I flooped, I left with a new triad mantra that is STILL informing my work, confirmed as I revisit this article in 2026:

• Purpose-driven distribution

• Community engagement

• Ethical design and inclusion

How? Align with groups that are working directly with populations in need of the medium – Young folks, schools, elderly… Don’t try to force a VR headset on someone’s head, if people aren’t showing up for it, there are reasons. So let’s find the right people and be collaborative. It’s not easy. Think Kent Bye interviewing East City Films team about touring In Pursuit of Repetitive Beats– It isn’t a mystery, it’s hard work… and a lot of unknowns.

So here’s a short letter to the folks who take the time to read it – I’m still here. And thankful. Curious, scared, hopeful.. I can see the work that needs to be done, and I’m putting myself out here to say I’m back. I’m finding my path, and whatever that looks like, I’m here for it.

XR, let’s GO!